August 11, 2011

  • this will be my last confession; I love you never felt like any blessing- whispering like it's a secret only to condem the one who hears it with a heavy heart.

     

    Split me in two; like an old piece of wood I feel splintered and this humidity is making my pain swell just to spill over my edges. I've been trying to run until my legs feel like battery acid, trying to burn you out of my memory. I sink further into myself, my guilt, my anger. I pull you closer just to taste the blood in my mouth [who is the betrayer? who's the killer in the crowd? The one who creeps in corridors and doesn't make a sound... my love has concrete feet, my love's an iron ball] 

    The sky has been grey for days and I just need to find some time alone inside myself. I can't find peace, only sharper shards of this broken mirror to drag across my porcelain skin again. It doesn't feel like enough, it doesn't feel like I can breathe, but I'll make that call, I'll take that drive, I'll let your hands search my body for the missing pieces that we both can't find.

     

    I can bend my will but I have no will to bend; I just wish I could break.